BDSM dictionary and encyclopedia
Get to know the most commonly used words and phrases in the BDSM environment - the BDSM dictionary gives you answers. The BDSM world is full of foreign words that can be difficult to understand. At BDSM Sex Dating, we have gathered the most used words, in a so-called online BDSM encyclopedia, where you can look up the words you encounter on your way.
24/7 Conditions
A BDSM relationship, often between one dominant and one or more submissive, where the game never ends. As the name suggests, the roles of Lord / Mistress and submissive are played uninterrupted, 24 hours a day, seven days a week. 24/7 relationships are usually based on a slave contract that the submissive (s) signs. This kind of relationship is very demanding and it can be difficult for other people - even other BDSM practitioners - to accept them. This can create complications in connection with the slave's job, family and circle of friends, who - sometimes rightly, other times completely wrong - will regard the relationship as unequal and harmful to the submissive. Each 24/7 relationship is unique and has its own special rules and rituals.
A
Abduction-play
Sexual role-play, in which the submissive is abducted, held captive and sexually exploited - including spanked or otherwise abused. Abduction-play is usually something the dominant arranges, without the submissive's knowledge, but with the responsibility of knowing the submissive's limits. Abduction-play is like something you play when you have established a close knowledge of each other's preferences - not something you do spontaneously. The amount of planning required in abduction play is high as it involves transporting the submissive to another location to be prepared in advance. A very widespread submissive fantasy is that one is kidnapped and exploited by many dominants - usually men - at once.
Aftercare
Something many submissives and masochists need after a violent BDSM session. Aftercare involves whatever makes the person feel comfortable and safe again, eg conversation, massage, food and drink, a hot bath etc ..
Age-play
Sexual relationship between two or more parties who play a role that they have a different age than they have - almost always with a large (fictitious) age difference between them. Age-play can, for example, be about an adult and a baby or a young, naive girl and an old man. Fantasies about age difference are very widespread, but the realization of them, even in the form of role-playing games, is taboo due to fear of pedophiles. Typical examples of age-play are diaper-play, Lolita relationship, sissification and daddy play. See also Baby grill, Brat and Diaper play.
Anal-plug
A piece of sex toy intended for use in the anus. There are a multitude of different variants, but most are teardrop-shaped and provided with a stopper (a kind of pairing bar, just like on a sword). The shape and stopper make plugs easy to insert and prevent them from getting stuck or disappearing up into the receiver's anus. Available and as rows of balls in varying sizes that feel tantalizing when brought in and out. Special anal plugs for men are designed to stimulate the prostate. Anal plugs are available with and without vibrator and in various materials, such as plastic, rubber, steel and even wood. Also called Butt plugs.
Anal fisting
A variant of anal sex where you use your hand. The whole hand. Fisting in the ass starts with one finger being accompanied by one more finger, and then another until one has his entire fist buried in his partner. It is a violent experience, but many find it overwhelming in the good way. One should use rich amounts of lube for anal fisting, and be careful not to harm his partner. Read the guide on anal fisting here. See also Vaginal Fisting.
Anal sex
1) Collective term for all sex that has to do with the anus: Rimming, anal fisting, use of anal plugs etc.
2) The term for “standard” anal sex, where the man penetrates a woman's or another man's anus. If a woman penetrates a man's anus, it is called pegging, respectively. A situation where one women takes another woman anal with a strap-on has interestingly no designation.
Anuscope
Medical instrument to enlarge the anus with, to make the vision better in connection with rectal examinations.
Asphyxiaphilia
The Latin term for turning on being suffocated, denied oxygen to the brain, hung, etc. See Breath Control.
B
Baby girl / brat
Terms for women and men, respectively, who take on the role of children and teenagers in age-play role-playing games.
Ball Crusher / Stretcher
Torture instruments for C&B. A Ball Crusher massages the man's testicles. It can have many shapes and be made of many materials. Typical examples are nutcracker-like instruments of steel and vice-like tools with plates of wood. Stretchers, or ball stretchers, are made to pull the scrotum longer - a painful process that usually prevents the man from moving. These can be simple cylindrical weights to tighten the purse, or intricate torture machines with many details. The most famous model that both crushes and stretches the balls is The Humbler - which at the same time prevents the man from moving without cruel consequences.
Ball-gag
Mouth gag, whose primary purpose is to block the submissive mouth and activate the drooling reflex. Usually consists of a ball to place in the mouth, attached to two pieces of leather that can be closed around the victim's neck with metal buckles. Classic BDSM equipment available in many variants, sizes and colors, the most common of which is a red ball with black leather strap.
Blindfold
English word for a piece of fabric, a half mask or the like used to cover the submissive's eyes.
Blood
Body fluid that most people are probably familiar with. Blood can be a fetish in many different ways. Some masochists turn to drinking menstrual blood from their mistress, as a submissive act. Others turn to bleeding due to cutting or whipping - both the physical sensation of warm blood with the skin, but also the intoxication that comes with a mild blood loss. Some sadists turn on the sight of blood and the thought of leaving permanent injuries on the body of the masochist. There are also people who turn on drinking blood. See Vampirism.
Blood choking
A form of breath control, where the sadist - briefly - puts pressure on the masochistic arteries in the throat. In this way, less oxygen reaches the brain, and an intoxication of roundness and endorphin discharges occurs. Read the guide to brath control and blood choking here.
BDSM
Common term for a sexual interest in pain and dominance. This is a kind of triple abbreviation in English, where BD stands for "bondage & discipline", DS for "dominance & submission" and "SM" for "sadism & masochism". In this way, the four letters contain a whole world of their own. Two people can both be described as practitioners of BDSM without turning on the same things at all. BDSM is a gigantic term that spans everything from gentle domination and sensory play to hardcore urine sex, cutting and branding. The BDSM abbreviation was first used around 1969, but back then Dominance and Submission were not part of the concept - they have come to later.
Body bag
Literally a body bag. Used by rescuers, police and undertakers to store and transport corpses in. Usually made of PVC or another type of thick, durable plastic. Used by BDSM practitioners with a penchant for mummification, total enclosure, asphyxiaphilia, plastic fetishism and death play. Body bags can be dangerous to play with as they are made for dead people and therefore are difficult or impossible to breathe through. Use of body bags is a variant of Total Enclosure.
Bondage
Originally means "Captivity". Designation to be tied or chained so one can not move. The word “bondage” itself is most often used in connection with the use of ropes, but the term covers all forms of fixation: sweaters, handcuffs, leather cuffs, strips, tape, bandages, barbed wire, etc. Even very specific forms of BDSM, such as mummification and total enclosure, is basically bondage. Bondage is almost always about establishing a power or control relationship between the dominant and the submissive.
Bondage, Japanese
See Kinbaku.
Bondage cross
See Skt. Andreas Cross
Bottom
Second word for the submissive in a BDSM relationship. The bottom is in this case subject to the Top. Understanding these words is important for understanding the concept of “Topping from the Buttom”, which describes how a submissive partner may end up costing his dominant partner, with negative consequences as a result.
Breath Control
Choking, hanging, drowning, blood choking or other forms of control of the oxygen supply in the masochist. A dangerous game, but something that many people turn on to varying degrees. In many ways, the ultimate exercise of control over another human being.
Branding
Permanent labeling of skin with glowing iron. This is a really extreme form of BDSM. Historically, animals and slaves have been branded for millennia to prove ownership of them, and branding between BDSM practitioners works in the same way. A dominant or sadist brands his slave, to show that he / she is his / her property - almost never as part of "ordinary" play with pain. Sometimes used in 24/7 conditions. Branding is by no means a common thing.
Bukkake
Originally a form of Japanese porn - Bukkake means "to splash" in Japanese - which arose because Japanese censorship banned filmmakers from showing bare genitals. Bukkake means that one person is showered with sperm, either by men ejaculating in addition to him, or by emptying a bowl full of sperm over him. The genre has existed since the 1980s and has gained a large foothold in the West as well. Traditionally a heterosexual genre, but more and more gay porn with a bukkake theme is being made. Also available in a variant where the person in the center is exposed to urine bukkake. Bukkake is usually interpreted as very humiliating for the receiving party, and has therefore been eagerly adopted by the BDSM community.
Bull-whip
Whip with one long whip that grows directly from the handle - an Indiana Jones whip. The name is due to the fact that in the old days they were made from the skin of bulls penises, as it was considered some of the best and most hardy leather. Bull-whips are some of the most painful percussion instruments, and require thorough training as they are difficult to hit accurately with.
Bunny
Name for the person who allows himself to be bound during a bondage session. The word is usually used about professional performers working with a rigger.
Butt Plug
See anal plug